


the day bleeds into nightfall [and you’re not here to get me through it all]

by galactic_cam



Category: Iron Man (Movies), Spider-Man (Tom Holland Movies)
Genre: Avengers: Endgame (Movie) Compliant, Avengers: Endgame (Movie) Spoilers, Avengers: Infinity War Part 1 (Movie) Compliant, Avengers: Infinity War Part 1 (Movie) Spoilers, Canonical Character Death, Character Death, Death, Gen, Grief/Mourning, I Can't Believe I Wrote This, I'm Sorry, Post-Avengers: Endgame (Movie), Post-Avengers: Infinity War Part 1 (Movie), Sadness, Sorry Not Sorry, Why Did I Write This?
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-06
Updated: 2020-01-06
Packaged: 2021-02-27 05:14:32
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 948
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22151617
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/galactic_cam/pseuds/galactic_cam
Summary: Peter dies, and Tony mourns. Tony dies, and Peter mourns
Relationships: Minor or Background Relationship(s), Pepper Potts/Tony Stark, Peter Parker & Tony Stark
Kudos: 17





	the day bleeds into nightfall [and you’re not here to get me through it all]

**Author's Note:**

> This was a mess, so I re-wrote it! TW: Self hate, death, cannon-typical injuries [mentioned] (bullet wounds, stab wounds).
> 
> I really hope you... enjoy? cry over? like? this fic!

_ And then the day bleeds _

_ into nightfall _

_ and you’re not here _

_ to get me through it all _

_ I let my guard down _

_ and then you pulled the rug _

_ I was getting kinda used to being someone you loved _

_ -Someone You Loved by Lewis Capaldi _

_ 1. _

Peter was dead. 

Some days, Tony thinks he died with the kid. He thinks his soul left his body back on the orange planet, when his kid had faded to dust in his arms.

Tony had loved Peter. He could admit it to himself, now, in the aftermath. 

  
Tony wasn’t sure what, but there was something so lovable about the kid that he’d broken straight through the barriers that Tony’d spent so long building up. Tony hadn’t really minded. He did now. He had these barriers up for a reason, and that reason was that stuff like this always happened to the people he loved.

It was the kids birthday tomorrow, and he would have been 16. One of the many birthdays the kid’s never gonna get to celebrate, all because Tony finally met a villain he couldn’t match. All Tony’s fault that the kid had been on that godforsaken planet when the stones had played their cruel lottery.

“Tony, it’s not your fault,” Pepper tells him when she found him in the lab at 2am, once again working on a way to fix something unable to be fixed. 

Tony stands up quickly, letting the wrench in his hand clatter to the floor. “It’s my fault he was on that stupid planet. It’s my fault we couldn’t stop Thanos!”

“It’s not, Tony. I promise. Come back to bed.”

He had let himself be led back to bed, but didn’t sleep. He stared at the ceiling, and thought about Peter. 

Peter had trusted him. It was in his eyes when Tony helped him on patrol, in his eyes when Tony’d stitch up stab wounds and bullet holes in the bathroom at midnight. It was in the way sleepy Peter curled into his side, in the way Peter’d call for him after a particularly bad nightmare. It was there, in Peter’s eyes, as he’d faded to dust on a planet on the other side of the galaxy. Peter believed the he, Tony, would make things right, make some magical fix that would bring him back in a day or two. 

So Tony had to fix this. Had to make the kid who trusted him proud, had to get him back so he  _ could _ be proud. And so his sleepless nights in the workshop, days without sleeping or consuming anything other than coffee and all of the material on the stones he could get his hands on, were all worth it, because Peter Parker, the kid from Queens, wasn’t allowed to stay broken. And it was up to Tony to fix him.

But at the end of the day, Peter Parker was dead, not broken, and mechanics don’t fix people anyways. So Peter Parker was gone for good, and as the sun set over the lake at the end of the day, Peter wouldn’t ever be there to watch it with him.

2.

Tony was dead.

He’d come to terms with the word a long time ago. Dead meant gone, it meant that the person would never smile or laugh or cry or talk ever again. After his parents, and then Ben, how could the word not sit crystal clear in his mind?

He always forgot how big of a hole death left in your life.

After homecoming, after the Vulture, Tony was always there. Peter had been granted an all-access pass to the newly rebought Stark Tower, and afternoons spent in Tony’s lab before patrol had been normal, something to be expected.

But Tony was dead. Tony was dead because Peter hadn’t done enough. Peter should have snapped the gauntlet while it was in his hands. Because then Tony wouldn’t be dead, and would be sitting on this roof with him, listening to Peter ramble as they watched the sun paint the sky red and orange. 

If Tony was still here, he’d say it wasn’t Peters fault. That Tony had made his decision, and that nothing could have changed that. But Tony wasn’t here. Tony wasn’t in his lab, or up at the cabin where he probably would now be, with his wife and daughter. Tony would never call him in the middle of AP Chem even though Tony’d known very well that Peter was in class, or drive up to his highschool in the flashiest car he owned, the fire-engine red lamborghini Peter hated.

Peter had been used to it. When Tony pulled up in front of his school in the car, he’d have a flash of annoyance at the man’s flambouancy, ruining Peter’s perfectly good ‘loser’ status. He’d even started blocking Tony’s number during school hours so his calls wouldn’t even buzz in his pocket. He’d be annoyed when a call was patched through during patrol telling Peter to get home

He’d been so used to the eccentric billionaire, that the man had become Tony, and then, only to himself, dad.

Peter should have known better to let someone fill the spot of a father in his life. He’d lost two before Tony, his father and Ben, and two was too many to be bad luck. It was him, his love. It killed. If he’d only stayed away, kept Tony at a distance despite everything inside of him screaming to go to the man, then maybe he’d still be here right now. 

But Peter hadn’t had the sense to do that, so he was dead. And Peter couldn’t do anything about that fact.


End file.
